Thanks Giving

We ate, we drank. We hugged, we kissed. We enjoyed family and friends (or, at least, tried hard to). We watched a little football or maybe tossed one around. We strolled the neighborhood. And we ate and drank some more.

We took a break from the race, slept in, and celebrated the quintessential American holiday.

But did we do what the holiday is designed for? And, no, we're not talking about being thankful. That's too inwardly focused; far too passive.

Instead, we ask whether we gave thanks? Truly gave thanks? You know, that heartfelt, soulful, unabashed, eyeball-to-eyeball, really-mean-it thank you? The thank you that is followed by a handshake, kiss and/or warm hug? An emotional thank you for health, support, and guidance. To those who give us work. To those who make us laugh. To those who help us listen. To those who cause us to think. To those who inspire. To those who make us better. To those we love.

No, you say? Somehow you made it through the day without stopping to give real thanks? Join the party, because you're apparently not alone.

We're here to tell you that it's not too late. The holiday may be behind us, but the opportunity to give thanks abounds. Seize it! Reach out and thank someone. Truly thank someone for his or her influence on your life. Make a call, write an e-mail, give that hug -- the form isn't nearly as important as the heartfelt gesture (though it's hard to beat a hug).

And then do it again. And again. Until you've thanked everyone significant in your life. You know who they are -- but do they know how important they are to you? Tell them. Tell them all. In the process, you'll make hearts soar. Yours included.

As we urged a few weeks ago in honor of 11/11/11 (November 13 blog), live loud. This is how.

Disorders for a New Century

Have you noticed how we've been overrun, suddenly, with trained psychologists and psychiatrists? How just about everyone can diagnose a behavioral or emotional disorder without the benefit of education, training, testing or, for that matter, any interaction with the individual? And do so on the spot with little -- or any -- real evidence? With complete confidence?

What skill! What insight! What brilliant powers of observation!

What a crock.

Hear of a child who keeps his room very neat? Must be OCD. (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder for the few non-psychologists/psychiatrists among us.) Because, after all, what other kind of kid is tidy?

Or someone who is highly organized and prides him or herself on being punctual? OCD, again. Being organized -- once a prized attribute -- is now, according to many, the symptom of a serious emotional problem.

Or what about a student who daydreams and bores easily in class? A clear case of Attention Deficit Disorder, the dreaded ADD. I mean, really. What type of student could possibly allow his or her mind to wander while in class? Or get bored in school? Couldn't possibly be because school might be dull, could it? No way. Must be ADD.

Or a 'bright' child who doesn't do her homework and would rather play video games. Without doubt, the famed ADD. Indeed, it could only be a serious disorder that would drive a 'bright' child to avoid homework in favor of video games. Couldn't possibly be that the child may not be quite so 'bright' or that playing video games is more fun than doing homework? No, it's simply not possible. Not today. Must be a disorder. Must be ADD.

Or an overweight person who eats when not hungry? Of course, an eating disorder. Because only someone with an eating disorder eats when he or she is not hungry. At least now we understand why obesity runs rampant in our country: Eating disorders abound. Can't be because many of us aren't able control the hand-to-mouth-with-soda-or-cookies-in-it action, could it? No. It's much easier to blame a disorder than ourselves. It's not me, it's this damned disorder!

Actually, this quick-to-diagnose reflex may be a disorder unto itself. Ah, a topic for another day.

In response to the uneducated, untrained, unlicensed among us who are eager to diagnose serious emotional and behavioral disorders -- and OCD, ADD and eater disorders are certainly in that category, especially when they inhibit normal, healthy behavior -- I say this: Cease and desist! For two substantial reasons:

1. It's irresponsible.

2. You are likely wrong.

You don't go around diagnosing cancer whenever you see a mole, do you? Or any other medical malady whenever you hear of a pain. So why do you so readily and wantonly ascribe a disorder to what might be a normal set of behaviors or, in the very least, a set of behaviors that can be attributed to something other than a disorder?

Might that kid who's highly organized be just that: Highly organized. (By the way, remember when that a good thing?)

Or what about the student who bores easily in class? Maybe the teach is dull, or the subject matter is uninteresting, or the student has other things on his or her mind?

Or the person who eats to excess? Maybe, just maybe, that person isn't afflicted with a disorder at all. Maybe that person just likes to eat. A lot.

If this sounds a bit emotional, forgive me. It's just that labeling people, without the benefit of a rigorous process, is potentially harmful in itself.

But I understand the need many of us have to attribute behavior to a psychological disorder. (It's one of the reasons I chose this profession.) To that end, I offer two new disorders. Both have yet to be fully documented, so we, together, are on the leading edge of understanding, recognizing and diagnosing each of them. Join me in welcoming two new disorders for the 21st century, currently running rampant throughout our society.

Smartphone Dependence Disorder (SDD). This significant and debilitating behavioral and emotional disorder manifests itself in a continuous and ceaseless connection to and interaction with a PDA. Symptoms of SDD include:

• Frequent holding, fondling, caressing and/or cleaning of the device
• On-going, surreptitious reference to the device, often in one's lap, just below table or desk level
• A belief that the interaction with the PDA is, indeed, secret and not observable by anyone (Hey, if no eye contact is made, how can anyone see what I'm doing?)
• The continuous, invasive thought that some new, exciting, and/or time-critical e-mail may have just been received that requires instant response; and,
• That life as we know it is simply not worth living without constant access to e-mail, texting, Facebook or the Internet.

Therapies to deal with SDD are typically unsuccessful. To date, the only actions seen to be effective in preventing the behaviors associated with the disorder, at least temporarily, include:

1. Physical separation of the device from the owner. A minimum of 5 miles is required.

2. Destruction of the device. Throwing the phone into a large body of water, preferably from a substantial height, has proven to be the most successful approach, although tossing the device onto rocks is also effective. In both cases, it is essential that the person suffering from SDD witness the device's complete destruction. (Note: Mere breakage is not sufficient.)

While the brand of PDA is irrelevant, SDD is more often seen in owners of iPhones. For obvious reasons. That said, they don't call it a Crackberry for nothing.

Bloodless Heart Syndrome. This serious malady appears to be abundant early in the 21st century and, as a result, can be observed widely. It manifests itself with the following fervent beliefs:

• That the poor and others without substantial means/resources should be left to their own devices
• That the poor are poor because they choose to be
• That leaving poverty is within everyone's grasp, requiring only an effort to find a well-paying job
• That taking care of oneself is just that: The need to take care of oneself -- and not rely on government to do so
• That taxing everyone fairly is an outdated, inappropriate concept that's so last century
• That if 2/3 of the world's billionaires are self-made, anyone can do it; and,
• That the best healthcare insurance is to stay healthy.

BHS -- not to be confused with Berkeley High School (Go Jackets!) -- strikes Republicans and Tea Party members with high frequency. Actually, BHS may be a requirement for party membership.

To date, only one treatment has proven effective: Becoming poor. Losing one's home accelerates recovery, especially if that home was bought with a subprime loan.

So, as we head into Thanksgiving, I ask two things:

1. Enough already with the knee-jerk diagnoses of what are serious behavioral and emotional disorders. Leave that to trained professionals.

2. Instead, focus on two readily observable disorders for the 21st century. They have yet to find their way into the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders IV, so both are fair game. Go at it! Find the sufferers of SDD and BHS among us.

Have a very happy Thanksgiving. Leave your PDAs at home and eat too much. And don't let anyone accuse you of having a bloodless heart.

Living Loud

In honor of Veteran's Day, this year falling on the perfectly symmetrical date of November 11, 2011 -- you know, 11/11/11 -- we at The Job of Work, along with many of you, can't help but be reminded of that precious scene from Rob Reiner's brilliant 1984 mockumentary This Is Spinal Tap in which band member Nigel Tufnel explains to Rob why his amp has the ability to play louder than any others. Check it out.



Hey, if you want your band to be the loudest, you better have amps that go beyond what was previously thought possible, right? Makes sense to us. In a kind of a Nigel Tufnel way, that is.

But maybe Nigel was trying to tell us something. Something important.

Maybe we should all try to live loud, louder than others.

No, we don't mean at the top of our lungs. Not that kind of loud. We mean living loud: With honesty, immediacy, excitement. Authentically. Being truly present. In the moment, in every moment. With awe. With joy.

As if today was our very first day. That's living loud.

(Not as if it were our last day, as many urge. I don't know about you, but if I were to live each day as if it was my last, I'd be watching the clock constantly, concerned with each passing second. I'd also be wondering what I would get for my last meal and whether I should have the curly fries or the mashed potatoes. Pie or cake? I'd also be thinking that there's no need to attend to work since I won't be around tomorrow to deal with the repercussions. No, living each day as if it were our last seems shortsighted, in more ways than one.)

Instead, we hope you live each day as if it's your first. With unbridled curiosity. Like that first day when everything was new. When everything was interesting, full of color and complexity. When you didn't know where the roads led or the planes landed. Where everything was a wide-eyed wonder. Where there was splendor at every turn. When each new day was truly that: Utterly, completely new.

When you asked questions, many questions, most beginning with 'Why?' When each answer led to another question. And another. So open you were to learning, so hungry you were for information, for reason.

When mysteries abounded. When being smart meant you sought answers rather than having them. Where being inquisitive was the ideal. When you could go out and play and, indeed, play. For hours.

That's what we mean by living loud.

So, in honor of 11/11/11 and Nigel, turn it up to 11. Don't hesitate and don't be afraid. You already know how to do it. Give it a try. And here's a thought: Take someone along with you. It might take some 'splainin', as Ricky might say, but it will be worth it. And when you make it, when you're living loud, write to us to tell us what it's like. About how brilliant the images, how wonderful the sounds, how fragrant the aromas, how each new encounter is a universe unto itself.

And after you've been living loud, after you've turned it up to 11, ask yourself this:

Is there any better way to live?

Thanks, Nigel.

Getting America Back to Work, One Person At a Time

The job search we'd love to see:

Wanted:

• Leader of Occupy Wall St., an Emerging Class Revolution. (Exact job title, if there is to be one, to be negotiated with the successful candidate.)

Duties/Responsibilities:

• Create a successful, sustainable socio-political-economic movement
• Provide overall strategic and tactical direction for Occupy Wall St. movement
• Define tangible goals for the movement and gain widespread support for them
  
• Organize efforts in 25+ cities domestically and 30+ cities worldwide
• Generate press coverage (i.e., print, television, digital) to communicate/market movement's agenda and accomplishments
• Capture the hearts and minds of current participants
• Attract a significant number of new participants from both the 99% and 1% population segment, growing the movement significantly to achieve the movement's goals
• Additional duties and responsibilities to be set following the successful incumbent's first year on the job

Skills/Abilities:

• Unparalleled leadership/motivational skills
  
• Outstanding strategic planning and execution skills
  
• Thorough knowledge of the current economic climate, U.S. tax codes, unemployment trends, and both U.S. and global politics
  
• Strong verbal and writing skills
  
• Compelling media presence (i.e., strong on-camera persona, ability to converse fluidly with Rachel Maddow, Chris Matthews, Keith Olbermann, Michael Moore, CNN, the BBC, and NPR)
• Ability to converse fluidly with Fox News optional, given that coverage 0n that network likely won't occur
  
• Excellent marketing/sales abilities
  
• Must be able to distinguish clearly the movement's 99% reference from Herman Cain's 9-9-9 plan
  
• Negotiating skills are desired but may not required (unsure if negotiating will occur)
  
• Conversational Spanish highly desired
  
• Must possess thick skin, mind of a successful business leader, soul of a revolutionary (though no requirement to wear a beret)
  
• Ability to work afternoons and nights, as little happens in the morning in a revolution
  
• Willingness to live and sleep outdoors for extended periods
  
• Proven track record of leading a diverse population in a revolutionary cause desired but not required

Extensive travel is anticipated.

Compensation:

The position pays $0 and does not include health benefits or personal time off. All living and travel expenses are the responsibility of the successful applicant. Book deal certain to follow the achievement of the movement's objectives. Television mini-series and/or full-length motion picture also possible. Political office is a distinct possibility (where special interest lobbyists will keep you very well cared for).

Applicant beware: Becoming a member of the 1%, while likely, is to be avoided (or, at least, denied publicly).

To apply:

Send cover letter, bio and photo to this blog. Reference 'occupywallst leader'. Materials must be received by November 30, 2011.

Occupy Wall St. is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

Things Never to Say at Work

On October 19, CBS MoneyWatch.com posted an enthralling column about the 7 phrases never, ever to use at work (or anywhere else). It had its points, to be sure, but it largely missed the barn. By a wide margin. Said another way: Not close enough for horseshoes or even hand grenades. Said one other way: Lame.

Not to cast aspersions on CBS MoneyWatch.com, but we think their 7 phrases was a big swing and a miss. And we should know, right? I mean who swings and misses more often than we at TJOW? When it comes to swings and misses, we are the market leader. (You'll give us that, won't you?)

At any rate, CBS MoneyWatch.com would have you never use these phrases:

• When
• Someday
• Willpower
• Want/Wish/Hope
• Not good enough
• I don't have time, and
• It's not the right time.

Their main points: It's in your control and now is the time.

Nice sentiments. But, as it turns out, none are really about work. We wish they were. (Oops. Sorry. They said to never use the word 'wish'. Don't tell the good folks at CBSMoneyWatch.com who, by the way, ought to be watching money rather than telling us what not to think or say. That's our job.)

So, as a public service we offer TJOW's 7 expressions never, ever to think or say at work.

Here we go:

1. Your crisis is not my concern. Ever notice those at work who bring things to a crashing halt? Those who operate at a different pace, soon to be referred to widely as the Prius Pace? (Ever driven behind a Prius? You know of what we speak. Can't these people drive the speed limit while watching the monitor that shows that they are getting a million miles per gallon? I guess not.) Coworkers who don't have the same level of urgency or simply don't share your concern for delivering quickly? These people should find a new place to play. There are plenty of mediocre companies out there where they'll feel right at home.

2. I'm too old to learn anything new. Without doubt, a bad thing to think and a worse thing to say at work. Many use this as a defense, others as a rationalization. For some, it may be truth. Regardless, you're never too old to learn. It might take you longer to get it, it might involve technology (which is getting easier and more intuitive by the minute) but as long as blood is flowing to your brain, you have the capacity to cram a bit more information into it. Trust us. We know.

3. Remember when? That rear-view-mirror approach to work is a waste, as wistful thinking about how wonderful the past was gets you nowhere. Those days are gone. Get over it. Turn your head in the direction your company is driving. Your neck will feel better almost immediately.

4. We don't need all of our customers. How many times have we heard this one! Especially from those who serve the public daily. Think: Flight attendants, sales reps, customer service staff, bank tellers (or those who used to be called 'tellers'), even executives. Those people who can make or break a company based on the service they provide. Every company should be on the lookout for this potentially profit-killing sentiment and the behaviors that come with it.

5. The feedback can wait until the annual review. Another common thought -- and practice -- in companies everywhere. Why help someone improve their ability to deliver top quality work? Said that way, you'd think honest feedback would be provided as the opportunity arises. But, no. Apparently, giving feedback -- nearly always negative -- is too difficult, takes too much energy, and is something to be avoided. What a shame, because many are missing the chance to up the game of others. And, of course, company performance suffers. Avoid this one like The Plague.

6. You're paying me too much. We at TJOW doubt that this has ever crossed anyone's mind at work. Certainly not today. Not with excessively lean organizations and the heavy work loads of those who still have jobs. Not with many working longer hours just to keep their heads above water. So while we doubt that this thought even comes to mind, we urge you never to think it. Certainly don't say it.

The last expression is probably the most common and, without doubt, in our way of thinking about the workplace, the one thought that has undermined the performance of countless companies. It is the one belief that has prevented sports teams -- teams filled with outstanding talent -- from winning. The concept and the behaviors that result are insidious and make the workplace anything but the collegial, team-oriented, winning place most of us desire.

7. It's not my job. Variations on this theme: That's beneath me. I get paid to do more important things. That's below my pay grade. To be fair, we've all likely thought this from time to time. Even so, it's a bad cognition and the behaviors that emerge are even worse. The concept speaks to hierarchy, seniority, condescension and other nasty, odoriferous dynamics that prevent top performance in functions and entire organizations. It's also a difficult belief to change. Thank goodness for clever, creative consulting firms that know how to transform behavior. (I'm thinking of one rather brilliant consulting firm in particular. It's initials: SCG.)

Those are our 7. Avoid them at all cost. And, of course, if you're seeing evidence of any of them at work, give a call. We can help.

Enjoy the week.

Current Events

What a week that was! Head-spinning events around the world and around town. If things weren't so bad, we might consider this one of the greatest times to be alive. If things weren't so bad.

To wit:

• Another bad guy bites the dust, hard. Moammar Khadafy, fashionista and oppressor, is yet another Middle East despot to be killed by his own people. Nothing says, 'We love you and will miss you' like publicly displaying his half-naked, bloody, bullet-strewn body in a freezer in a shopping mall. Talk about a reason not to kill your own people! That said, a word of advice to other dictators on the run: Stay out of holes. They don't seem to be a good place to hide. I'm talking to you, Syrian President Bashar Assad and you, Yemen President Ali Abdullah Saleh. Stay away from holes. Because, you know, you're not the most popular guys around. And remember: What goes around, comes around.
  

• At long last, an end to a war. So, we're finally leaving Iraq. To our way of thinking, it's 4,478 U.S. deaths and a trillion dollars too late, not to mention the untold death and destruction in Iraq. At least we got the weapons of mass destruction we came for. Not. Yet another worthless, prolonged conflict. But at least it's over. One down, two to go. (By the way, have the spin doctors -- those creative minds behind the scenes who help shape messaging so we, the ignorant, uneducated commoners, can embrace whatever they're selling -- ever been as brilliant as the day they came up with 'weapons of mass destruction'? We think not. WMDs are now part of our lexicon -- and part of our fear. Too bad we bought it -- that there were WMDs in Iraq and that WMDs are somehow a valid reason to invade a country illegally. Thanks, George. Nice going.)

• Another war brewing, one far more serious. Are we witnessing the beginning of a class war within our country and possibly around the world? It certainly seems so. The Occupy Wall St. movement appears to be growing in intensity and purpose, as thousands of protesters are encamped in hundreds of cities worldwide. A recent Associated Press-GfK poll (October 22) revealed that the movement has 37% support among U.S. voters. More revealing is that the same poll demonstrated that 58% of those voters are 'furious about American politics'. While the protests lack a spokesperson (where are you, Michael Moore?) and a unifying remedy, it's only a matter of time before this situation escalates. Why? Because widespread, prolonged unemployment + strong corporate earnings + highly publicized, enormous bonuses paid to money fund managers + a government unable/unwilling to act = a recipe for revolution. Said more simply, beware when many people do not have money for a prolonged period of time. This has the potential to get much worse before it gets better. Stay tuned.
  

• Still no jobs program. Meanwhile, with quiet efficiency, our elected officials in Washington have rejected all attempts to put a sizable number of people back to work. Whether it be teachers, police, and/or firefighters, the Senate -- with an amazing confluence of Republican obstinacy and Democrat disorganization -- has killed yet another part of the Obama plan to create jobs. At least we're paying them for not delivering what's most needed. Wouldn't want them to have to suffer like those out of work. We wouldn't want that, now would we? No, of course not. Not having money is a bad thing and something we would never wish on anyone, much less those working on the Hill. A word of advice to Congress: Beware when many people do not have money for a prolonged period of time. How soon might you become the focus of the Occupy Wall Street movement? I'm just saying.

Speaking of fear, last week we postulated that religion might not exist -- at least in its current forms -- if we lived forever. Indeed, what need would we have for a belief and faith system that has, as its defining feature, the promise of eternal life in an idyllic place? Or the threat of an eternal life in a place of untold horror? We wouldn't. Instead, we might focus on how best to live this life honestly, honorably, and with grace. Peacefully, with others who have different customs, social mores and values. We might find a way to live without fear.

Ah, if only we lived forever. Which, by the way, we do.

Quien es Mas Macho?

Quick: What was the #1 album in the country 45 years ago this week? If you said anything but Cheap Thrills by San Francisco's own Big Brother & the Holding Company, with a certain Janis Joplin on lead vocals, you clearly aren't the music fan you proclaim to be. You also aren't much for huge clues either, but that's a topic for another day.

What, can't remember anything about 1966? Not to worry. If you did the '60s, so to speak, you won't be able to remember them.

Speaking of taking another little piece of my heart, let's ruminate -- with a strong leaning toward venting -- on a number of recent events. Warning for the weak-stomached among us: Politics, religion and sports are involved in this 4-part blog. Reader be forewarned. Reader definitely beware.

1. Quien es mas macho? While the country continues to suffer through the worst economic climate nearly anyone under the age of 65 can remember (for those of you who can remember what you had for breakfast yesterday), NOTHING is being done at the Federal level to deal with the continued high level of unemployment. Obama talks -- and is finally beginning to rant -- but to date has not produced a jobs program. In the meantime, the Republicans are fully intent on keeping millions unemployed with the sole purpose of adding one more African-American man to the unemployment rolls following the next election. Is this not beyond comprehension? Who are these people and how do they live with themselves? This blatant, self-serving neglect for the American people borders on the criminal. I hope you, too, are keeping a list of every elected official in Washington who refuses to act to get people back to work.

Meanwhile, the Republican presidential candidates are attempting to differentiate themselves. Their debate is not how to right the economy, deal with our three wars, or resolve any of the other myriad issues we face. No, their debate is twofold:

• Who is most conservative, and
• Who is most Christian.

Amazing.

In the midst of this, Herman Cain is sounding more and more like the pizza marketeer he is with his 9-9-9 plan. Michele Bachmann sees the devil in this ('Looks like 666 to me!'), while many think 999 is the price of a pizza. Whatever. Cain, like just about every Republican candidate, has clearly not mastered high school math because it's going to be a bitch to support three wars on a flat tax of 9%. Unless, of course, it's only war he'll pay for.

Stay tuned, as it's certain to get even more ludicrous. (Wait until the talk about Planned Parenthood reaches its crescendo. That will be fun, but in a bad way.)

2. Why No Other Apples? Thank you for your notes about Steve Jobs following last week's column. I agree, of course. A huge loss. Even so, many wonder why there aren't other companies like Apple. There is an abundance of talent, with many highly creative, motivated people eager to push the proverbial envelope. And there are many passionate about melding functionality and art, regardless of industry. So why aren't there more Apples?

There are two possibilities:

1. Few know how to create a workplace where the freedom to be creative can coexist with discipline and productivity.

2. Few want to create a work place where the freedom to be creative can coexist with discipline.

Sadly, our research indicates that both are true. Many executives operate within 'traditional parameters', precluding their ability to create a special environment, one in which creativity can flourish. Others all too often scoff at the idea that freedom of thought and action are conducive to a productive and highly profitable workplace. We vehemently disagree! In fact our data indicate that the opposite is true: Control and long-term profitability are inversely proportional. Said more plainly: Increase control and long-term profitability suffers. The evidence is indisputable.

Think about it another way: Why didn't Microsoft invent the iPhone? The reason: They couldn't. Not that their people aren't as smart and as creative as those at Apple. No, Microsoft's environment -- their culture -- wasn't capable of supporting breakthrough thinking. This isn't a slam on Microsoft; it's simply the state of affairs there and in the vast majority of companies worldwide.

Hey, you know of what I speak. You live it every day.

In the wake of Steve's death, much will be made of his approach to leadership. Don't wait for the books, several of which are in the offing. Call us now and we'll help you get ahead of the curve. Somebody has to lead; why not your organization?

3. Abandon Football, Cal. A plea to Sandy Barbour, Athletic Director at the University of California at Berkeley:

Dear Sandy:

As a passionate alumni of Berkeley (B.A. and Ph.D.) and ex-faculty member (Department of Psychology), I politely ask that you disband the football program. Immediately. It's simply wrong on so many levels and does not reflect Berkeley in any way.

But let me count the ways:

1. Cal has not won the Pac-8 or Pac-10 since 1959. There's something about not being able to finish ahead of 7 and then 9 teams over the course of 52 years that takes futility to a level only surpassed by the Chicago Cubs. Now in the newly-formed Pac-12 we have 11 other teams to outplay. Like that will ever happen.

2. The team's coach, Jeff Tedford, is the highest paid employee of the State of California. Title aside, Jeff is a glorified gym teacher. That he is paid more than any of Berkeley's Nobel laureates is unspeakable.

3. Speaking of the Nobel prize, one of our guys just brought in another for the school. Saul Perlmutter won one in Physics. Two other 2011 winners had direct ties to Berkeley. This is what we're good at and what we should be investing in.

4. Cal has become a whore to TV money. Case in point: Not one ticket to any 2011 home game had the game time printed on it. Why? Because you wait until the last minute to pick which network is going to broadcast the game. Sandy, Saturday afternoon is college football. Period, done. Anything else is an abuse of our (waning) relationship. And, please, no more national broadcasts. Far too many can see for themselves how miserable we are at football.

5. Cal football is not representative of the creativity, inventiveness and diversity of the Berkeley campus. The game played by Cal is indistinguishable from hundreds of other colleges. Why haven't you gotten any of the school's 22 Nobel laureates involved in helping make Cal football unique?

6. What is 'American Studies'? Apparently, it's the official major of the majority of Cal football players. While it might be rigorous (right), it screams of junior college. Worse, it strongly suggests that our players aren't the students that, say, Stanford players are. Yet another embarrassment.

7. White helmets, Sandy? What were you thinking?

In sum, it's time to call it quits. Take the money you'll save and invest it in any number of other programs in the department. The hundreds of students participating in the shadow of football will thank you. And know that many will cheer your courage when you announce that the 2011 season of Cal football will be its last. I, for one, will be happy to have my Thursday night, Saturday afternoon or Saturday evening open again.

Go Bears! Please.

Respectfully yours,

A Season Ticket Holder since 1981 (Just call me Dr. Fool or Stupidly Optimistic or both.)

4. One Last Question. If there was no death -- if we lived forever -- would there be religion? I think not. We'll discuss this and other curious topics next week.

Commit an act of random kindness. You and someone else will feel great you did.