Promises, Promises

With a handful of days left in the year, it's time for TJOW to go out -- way out, as you'll see -- on the proverbial limb and make a number of predictions for 2011. Some of the predictions are rock-solid, others a bit whimsical, still others well toward the wishful-thinking end of the continuum. Regardless, all are worthy and will undoubtedly occur sometime in the New Year. Laugh (or grimace) now, but remember where you heard them first. That's right. Here at The Job of Work.

Let's start easy.

1. The new year will begin exactly eight days from Christmas. Ever wondered why New Year's Day occurs when it does? Asked another way, why isn't Christmas day the beginning of the new year? Given that we follow the Christian, solar-based calendar, one might think that the birth of Jesus would mark the beginning of the year. But, it obviously doesn't. Why? (Hint: It has everything to do with the fact that Jesus was born a Jew. Another hint: Jesus was a Jewish boy.) Regardless, our first prediction is that the new year will begin as it always does, eight days from Christmas.

Unless the Earth explodes in the next few days, that's one for TJOW.

2. Chivalry will abound in 2011. No, we're not predicting that the medieval knightly system of ethics and social behavior will return. Nor are we predicting that courteous behavior of men toward women alone will mark the year. Instead, TJOW's second prediction for the new year is that honor, courtesy and a readiness to help the weak -- the core of chivalry -- will make a huge comeback among men and women in 2011.

Look for it! Doors being held, seats offered to those in need on public transportation, drivers giving a wave of thanks when allowed to merge, people saying 'please', service providers treated graciously, e-mail answered, calls returned, people seeking ways to help others, heartfelt appreciation expressed when any attempt is made to support another person. People being nice to each other.

By the way, the strong return of chivalry will be caused by a zarkon gas-emitting meteor from the Gamma Quadrant passing perilously close to Earth early in the new year. It will go unreported to the public. We could, of course, include both the meteor and the government withholding its existence in our set of predictions. But, since you won't be told about the meteor, we'll end up arguing about the prediction's accuracy. For this reason, we won't include the mysterious meteor in our list of predictions and instead focus on the outcome of the meteor. That's just the kind of people we are here at TJOW. (Not to worry: zarkon gas is colorless and odorless and offers no Invasion of the Body Snatchers-type health issues, aside from making us nicer.)

3. Face-to-face or, at the very least, voice-to-voice communication will make a comeback. Shocking but true, personal communication will return to prominence in 2011. Facebook will decline in popularity -- does anyone really care what someone ate for breakfast? -- and Twitter's 15 minutes of fame will end, largely because many will admit that having to express one's self in 140 characters is incredibly limiting and just stupid. Instead, people will use their phones to "talk" to their friends and family.

4. Greed will reign supreme in professional sports. Enjoy the current NFL, NBA and NHL seasons. These will be the last in 2011 as lock-outs and/or player strikes will hit all three leagues. Fans will grieve the loss, but will be buoyed when bookies begin to take bets on reality television shows and Glee. Nike will market an entire clothing line to enable more athletic sitting. Book sellers will experience record profits as sports fans turn to reading. (Just kidding.) Hope you enjoy baseball and women's basketball. Oh, and soccer.

5. Reality programming on television will expand. Look for more true 'reality' programs to hit the airwaves in 2011. Not elaborate game shows (a la Survivor), but programs that capture the lives of others. Look for Fox's LA Dog$, a candid, in-depth look at the canine pets of Hollywood celebrities. NBC will counter with Kool Kats, which will bomb. E! will introduce Babysitters to the Stars, while VH1 will air Paris Who? which will follow the lives of people who have never heard of nor care at all about Paris Hilton. (What, you think we're making this stuff up?)

6. Green will definitely be the new black. 2011 will be the year we turn the corner on fossil fuels. Alternative energy sources will reign supreme in the new year, as breakthroughs in solar, wind and wave power will capture our imagination and cause us to believe that we can, indeed, live on this planet without killing it. It will become hip to conserve. Urban farming will flourish. Apps will be created to calculate and help reduce one's carbon footprint. Taking public transportation will be considered cool. And in a story that won't be widely reported, a discovery in the physics department at the University of California, Berkeley will lead eventually to the creation of warp drive. (Really.)

7. Global warming will accelerate. Even while we race to develop new energy sources, it will be abundantly clear -- even to Glenn Beck -- that the Earth is angry and won't take it anymore. Watch for freaky, violent weather worldwide. A hurricane in California, an earthquake in Florida, flooding in Phoenix, weeks of sunshine in Seattle, excessive heat across northern Europe. Make your vacation plans accordingly.

8. Health will equal wealth. Our interest in wellness will increase dramatically in 2011. Sales of organic, gluten-free foods will skyrocket. Fried foods will decline in popularity (but will still taste oh so good). Macaroni and cheese will no longer be consider a vegetable. Exercise will become even more popular, with many taking to walking and bicycling. Some will even realize that spandex bike clothes are unnecessary and, for many, inadvisable. The currently popular overweight, poached look will begin to ebb, because obesity is so last century.

9. Unemployment will subside. 2011 will be the year of job creation. As confidence returns to the business world, companies will begin to hire in earnest. Look for solid growth in the tech, manufacturing, health care and financial services sectors. As a result, consumer spending will increase and despite some bumps in the road, the light at the end of this economic tunnel we've been in will be in full view.

10. Life will be worth living. 2011 will be a very good year. We'll talk to each other more. We'll treat each other with more kindness, compassion, dignity and respect. We'll become more fit. We'll seek better ways to preserve the planet. The economy will continue to improve. Many more will have jobs, restoring pride and confidence. We'll be forced to live with more inane television shows and less professional sports, but we'll survive. We'll be happier in 2011. And, yes, the San Francisco Giants will defend their World Series championship.

That's our story and we're sticking to it.

To a very happy and healthy 2011. Enjoy every minute of it.

Do You Believe In Magic?

Before we begin in earnest, let's review two events from the past week:

1. As you will recall, on Sunday, December 12, TJOW published a column focused on the military's Don't Ask, Don't Tell (DADT) policy. It was the first time we had written about this unconstitutional, discriminatory approach to squelching free speech and individual freedom in the military workplace, a policy that cost a reported 13,500 people their job.

2. A mere seven days later, on Saturday, December 18, in a 63 to 33 vote, the Senate repealed DADT. After 17 years, the ban on gays and lesbians serving openly in the military will end.

We post on December 12 and the Senate takes historic action on December 18. Coincidence? You be the judge.

Calls to leading senators of both parties to confirm the connection between our blog and their vote have not yet to be returned.

Of course we still await the President's response to TJOW's two compelling proposals, each designed to put at least 5 million unemployed back to work (Dear Mr. President, August 8; Dear Mr. President, Part II, August 29). Mr. President, please get with the program. We're talking two worthy plans here. And, Dude, don't look now but you could use a significant boost in the polls, having alienated just about everyone who voted for you with the extension of the Bush tax cuts. So take a look at our proposals and get in touch. We're talking jobs, Mr. President. Time's a wastin'.

Speaking of magic, it seems that there's simply too little of it to go around these days. That bounce in the step, sparkle in the eye, confidence in the voice that motivates, strengthens and emboldens us to act with determination. That mojo that raises valleys, lowers mountain tops, that makes even the most audacious goals seem somehow possible, attainable. That energy that quells doubts, calms nerves, that inspires us to dream of what can be. The spirit of hope.

Yes, that magic.

So, we ask: What happened to it? Where's it gone?

And we answer: Nothing. It hasn't gone anywhere. It's still here. We're just not using it as often as we should.

Why we're not using it is easy to explain. The magic of which we speak is dampened by uncertainty and fear. The uncertainty that accompanies a poor economy. The fear that is the product of depressed corporate earnings, little or no revenue growth, on-going reorganizations, job eliminations. High unemployment. Budget crises in cities and states. Lowered giving to non-profits. The talk that the economy is yet to turn upward. The prognostications that growth will continue at a snail's pace. That we'll be in this for years.

Indeed, it's hard to be up-beat, optimistic in the face of the doom and gloom that we've been hammered with the last few years. How not to be affected by the onslaught of negativity? And let's not overlook the power of the season, as short, dark, cold days don't help. They, too, tend to undermine our ability to feel that warm glow of hope.

So, it's easy to explain the loss of the magic. A more important question, though, is this: How to get it back?

We fervently suggest the following:

1. Believe! The magic exists! Feel it, touch it, smell it (to steal a good line from The Producers). It's right where you left it, ready for use.

2. Start small. Let yourself feel a bit of optimism about something, anything. That this week will be better than the last. That a good thing will happen. That 2011 will be better than 2010. That there's reason to hope.

3. Build. Small gains beget larger gains. Allow the simple act of feeling optimistic warm your soul. Look carefully about you and you'll see that there is reason to be positive, to be confident. A child's smile might do it. A good laugh. A favorite song. The belief that life can be good.

4. Expand. As your confidence returns and the magic again flows, find a cause, a purpose. (What, you thought this was only about you? Don't be silly! You're not alone in this. The magic is wasted unless you use it for a greater good.) Have a favorite charity, an organization that needs your help? Yes? Cool. Get more involved. No? Find one before the week is out, make the call, and seek a specific way to help it. (Need help? I've got a list of dozens of wonderful organizations that would love your involvement.)

5. Share. Magic is more powerful when it can be shared. Amazing but true, our magic produces more when we help others feel it. There's nothing quite like bolstering someone's sense of optimism. Try it this week. It is, after all, the season of giving.

6. Maintain. Magic takes work. You've got to fight for it. Once you have it back, you've got to use it -- or lose it. Using it daily is easier than losing it and starting over again. Find reasons to be optimistic and use that magic to invigorate others. Together, we can recharge the souls -- the mojo -- of thousands.

Find the magic. Rekindle optimism. Help ourselves by helping others. Let's get a running start on 2011. We need it to be a very good year.

Happy birthday, Mom! And, of course, Merry Christmas! See you next week with predictions for 2011.

Bless Their Hearts (and a warning)

Warning. This blog contains:

• IP Intense Political Views
  
• GN Gratuitous Name-calling
  
• BR Borderline Ranting
• AH Attempted Humor
  
• ESUBEOWSKBBD Exposure of Self-serving, Unconstitutional Behavior by Elected Officials Who Should Know Better But Don't
  

Readers beware.

Bless their hearts. An expression from our Southern brothers and sisters packing marvelous power and unparalleled innuendo. An expression that honors the commitment, honesty, unswerving devotion of others. As in:

Bless his heart for all he's done for this organization. Bless her heart for the effort she's devoted to our team. Bless their hearts for the time they've given, for the money they've raised.

Ah, but that's only the half of it. For this same expression also isolates and calls out the frailties, inabilities, the absolute stupidity of others. As in:

He'd miss the point if it ran up, spun around, screamed 'You're an idiot!' and hit him between the eyes, bless his heart. She's got less sense than my dog -- and he's been dead for three years, bless her heart. They couldn't find a right answer to save their lives, bless their hearts.

Best yet is the subtle usage of this terrific expression, as in He certainly tries hard, bless his heart. Honoring the effort while bemoaning the failure. An elegant, polite, civilized way of calling someone a stupid f*****g idiot. But in a nice way. The epitome of passive-aggressive.

A fabulous expression, no? Use it a few times. It will grow on you.

Speaking of John McCain, bless his heart, let's take a moment to consider his inane and obstructionist position on the military's 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' policy. Earlier this month, Admiral Mike Mullen, the Chair of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and Robert Gates, the Secretary of Defense, both stated before Congress that this 1993 law had outlived its usefulness and urged its repeal. Backed by a comprehensive study that demonstrated overwhelming majorities of men and women serving in the armed forces are prepared to serve with openly gay or lesbian soldiers, they called for the end of the unfair, discriminatory, unconstitutional practice.

Was that enough for McCain? Did he heed the strong advice of those with the duty and responsibility to oversee the military? Did he allow the Secretary of Defense and the Chair of the Joint Chiefs of Staff to do their jobs? No, bless his heart. Why? Because John knows better.

Their interchange is a good one:



Let's step back for a moment to take stock of this amazing situation. Here we have the Secretary of Defense and the Chair of the Joint Chiefs of Staff stating with conviction before a hearing of the Senate Armed Services Committee on Capital Hill that all should have the opportunity to fight and die for their country without having to hide their sexual orientation. Gays and lesbians should have the right, the honor, they both testified, to serve their country openly with pride. Who would have thought we'd see this day? We have, without doubt, come a long way, baby.

And then there's John McCain, leading the Republican opposition to the repeal of a law that was wrong and illegal from the get go. As we're constantly reminded, the man's a war hero, so give him some credit. We can also be sure that he speaks from his heart. That said, McCain's supporting a position that is both discriminatory and unconstitutional -- two rather important failings, bless his heart.

The military is a place of work. Those who volunteer for the right to defend our way of life, our Constitution, by putting their life on the line should have the same protection under the law as people who work anywhere else in this country. Here, it's illegal to discriminate in the workplace due to, among other things: gender, age, ethnicity, religious affiliation and sexual preference. The only thing eligible for discrimination at work? Performance. That's it, John.

So, Senator McCain, we suggest the following:

• Let military leadership lead. Get out of the way of the Secretary of Defense and the Chair of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. Don't you have anything else to do?
  

• Wake up, Dude. The vast majority of military was born after 1985. Being gay or lesbian isn't a big deal to them.

• You swore to uphold the Constitution, John. Time to start, no?

• You're from Arizona. The sun can be fierce. Wear a hat.
  

Bless his heart.

Now to our warning: Stay away from E! network's Bridalplasty, a reality game show in which, according to E!, "Brides-to-be compete in challenges to earn plastic surgery procedures in a quest to win their ultimate dream wedding." E! goes on to say that this show is "the only one where the winner gets cut".

I'm not making this up. I couldn't. I'm not that sick.

Have a great week.

Spreading Joy

Nice to have you back. Nice to be back.

For many, this is a tough time of year. Shoppers bowling others over in store aisles and jostling in check-out lines as carols play in the background. Drivers maneuvering beyond aggressively for that last parking space, the winner -- the person who cut in front of you to take the space -- sporting a holiday wreath on the front of the car. People decked out in festive attire who refuse to stop talking on their mobile while paying -- how rude is that! -- and who become indignant, righteous even, when urged to get off their phone and move things along.

And that's when we're not at work. (Where many of us go if only to get a break from the mayhem of the holiday season.)

It's definitely a tough time of year. There's simply too much forced joy in the air. And not nearly enough kindness.

So we ask: Is being kind, spreading happiness such hard work? Apparently so.

We at TJOW, of course, beg to differ. Spreading joy isn't nearly as hard as many might think.

And let's be clear, we're not talking about random acts of kindness. We're talking about purposeful, consistent, on-going, habit-forming acts of kindness. Simple, no-cost acts of graciousness that, in their small way, spread joy.

Holding doors, allowing a car to merge, complimenting her shoes, praising his outfit, helping someone cross the street -- these are easy. Take a step up and tell a co-worker or two how much you appreciate them. Thank an employee for the sacrifices, for working long hours. Write to that long-lost friend. Call the cousin you miss. Tell a friend from high school about the crush you had on him/her. Advance to a yet higher level, go old-school and send a hand-written, heart-felt thank-you note to someone, anyone for just about anything. Send a note of appreciation to your CEO. Write to your mom, your dad. Give a friend a hug -- and not some lame, insincere air hug, but the real thing -- just because. Seek out someone you wronged and apologize. Write a poem. Sing a song.

We're offering small, easy, no-cost suggestions. Think for a moment and you'll have ideas. But don't let us get in the way of you going big. The Opera Company of Philadelphia has promised 1,000 random acts of culture, all designed to enrich the lives of others. This one is spectacular. We defy you not to feel better while watching.



Spread joy. You'll feel good. Someone else will feel good. And who knows? It just might become contagious. Millions might get into the act.

We're all in this together. We can make a conscious choice to be polite, considerate, even kind. Do that and we, together, can make this a much happier season -- a season that won't end on the 25th.

We're in. Are you?

And to those of you who'd like a new, non-Adam Sandler Chanukah song, check this out. It's a kick. Happy Chanukah!

Now get busy spreading joy.

When It's Just Mediocre

TJOW welcomes back Steve Lundeen. You laughed and cried with him a couple of weeks ago. Enjoy this point-counterpoint, dueling-banjos response to last week's blog.

Last week Alan exhausted the breadth and depth of my vocabulary in describing the most horrible work environments on the planet. It got me thinking that having things that bad is unusual – not rare today – but unusual.

What seems to be more 'usual' to me is a work environment that’s not engaging, not fun. I think for most of us it’s like living in Middle Earth, in purgatory. Not thrilled where we are and not unhappy enough to move on. Where everyone wants me to be engaged, but it’s tough to do when I’m spending most of my time looking over my shoulder wondering if I’m next on the 'hit' parade.

So, what to do? Seems like there are a few options...and they don’t have to be mutually exclusive.

Option 1: Quityourbellyaching!

Option 2: Get busy figuring out what 'next' looks like

Option 3: Re-engage

Let's consider each.

Option 1: Quityourbellyaching! Quityourbellyaching! is a sign my in-laws had in an obvious but discreet location in their kitchen. I never spent a lot of time in that house, but I do have vivid memories of my father-in-law, Sonny, giving the 'directional arrow' with his thumb to the sign when there was any hint of whining.

So if your work situation has you living in the land of mediocrity, I would suggest that the first course of action is to stop your personal pity-party and take a fresh outlook, a new perspective on the situation.

Option 2: Get busy figuring out what 'next' looks like. What does next look like? Rather than wallowing in that morass you seem to be in, start 'facing forward'. Rather than the world taking charge of your journey, reclaim your destiny. Clear you mind of what your world is imposing on you. All too often we are inappropriately influenced by those around us. Your support network has your best interest at heart, but they’re looking at your best interest through their eyes. While their intentions are good and pure, they’re giving you advice and direction based on their perspective and their values. Really paying attention to your own inner voice can be a daunting challenge with all the cacophony around you.

Take some time to cocoon and get introspective about where you want to go, what you want to do...and what you’re willing to commit to.

As you do so, consider the 4F’s:

• Failures – these are things you know you’ll never get. Admit you want them and then walk away.

• Fantasies – these are things you really want and thoroughly enjoy wanting them. For example, dating Angelina or Brad...or both of them...or playing for the World Champion San Francisco Giants (an Alan fantasy, to be sure).

• Frustrations – these are things you could have but aren’t willing to pay their price.

• Fulfillments – things you really want, are willing to pay the price for and can have or achieve. Obviously your energies are best placed here.

This is a busy time of year. The holidays are approaching, which may be incredibly distracting when considering your next big steps. But with the start of a new year, we all to some degree look toward launching new and more fulfilling things. If you’re in the land of mediocrity, take this time to contemplate 'next' and step into the land of commitment to make your dream, your vision happen.

Option 3: Re-engage. This is my favorite. Step up and become the leader that you are...or test drive the leader that you want to be. A quote I particularly love: “It’s very difficult to lead the orchestra when you’re using both hands to cover your ass.” It’s time for you to re-engage with your group, your department, your division, your company and make a difference for positive change. Step up and start leading your orchestra.

Your situation was once great. What does your new 'great' look like? What can you do to get on that course again? Remember the excitement of your first day, your first week in a new job? Make today your new first day and hit the day with renewed vigor for being a change agent for good. I don’t mean or want to sound too Pollyanna here, but you are in charge of you and you can make all the difference.

Of course, this is also a thinly veiled commercial for services we at The Schnur Consulting Group offer. Because that’s what we do – we help organizations drive change and accelerate growth through their most important asset, their people.

So, please, get out there and turn the culture of failure, of mediocrity, into a culture of winning. Rekindle your flame of enthusiasm. But first and foremost, take care of you. Pay attention, focus forward and have fun.

And remember, we can help.

Steve, a brilliant executive coach, can be reached at steve@schnurconsulting.com. Harass him as you would me.

When It's Bad, Real Bad

Ever worked in a place that was bad, truly bad? A place that gives new meaning to 'vile'?

A place that sets a new world record on the Horrid Place To Work Scale, achieving the dreaded -- but impressive in its own right -- rating of 'No Self-respecting, Intelligent, Reasonably-decent Human Being Should Ever, Ever Work Here'. Yes, that high. Or that low.

A place that takes stupidity to entirely new heights. Stupidity that's incomprehensible, nearly indescribable. Where even you can't quite believe the things you see happen at work.

A place redefining 'demeaning'. Where relentless micro-management would be an improvement. Where management believes trust is demonstrated by not strip-searching employees when they leave work each day.

A job where Monday is dreaded and Tuesday is the hump day to the Hump Day.

A job where frustration builds logarithmically, is endless and unavoidable. Where it actually seems as if things are done purposefully to create frustration, especially in those trying to get things done.

A place awful in every way conceivable. Where even the air has an odor, where the water is foul.

A job creating such boredom that you actually take time to calculate how much you earn each minute, remembering to control for holidays and other days off, subtracting the cost of commuting and food. And when that gets dull -- and depressing -- you figure out how much you earn with each breath.

A place where a bad decision is hoped for, longed for, since a bad decision is better than no decision at all.

Where doing a good job is pointless and, worse, may not even be desired.

A place where long hours are required but productivity is not.

A job in which co-workers actually resent when someone tries to deliver.

Where time until retirement is known by everyone. In hours.

A job you're embarrassed to admit you have. Even to yourself.

A place where there is, indeed, no hope.

We're talking bad. Real bad.

Ever had such a job? Worked in such a place?

We sincerely hope not.

But, given the economy and the impact it's had on many organizations throughout the world, we expect that you've experienced at least some horror, even if minor, where you work. For at times, even the best places to work resemble torture chambers of the worst kind. We've seen how a combination of a poor economy, falling stock price, diminishing market share, and overly ambitious goals can form a perfect storm that creates uncertainty, indecision, even paralysis, and undermines solid organizations. We've watched from afar as companies have lost relevance and we've seen the toll this has taken on what were once vibrant, successful businesses. We've followed the plight of organizations struggling to recover lost glory as they unwittingly -- yet highly effectively -- created a culture of failure and, in the process, extinguished the enthusiasm and drive of the people who work in them.

We've seen this all too often. And we know it's avoidable. Equally important, we know it can be fixed. Companies -- like most living, breathing entities -- can regain their swagger, their mojo. They can again create positive momentum. They can turn things around. They can win. But they'll need their people to do it.

So, even if your job and workplace score high on the Horrid Place To Work Scale, there is hope. The economy is turning. We can see sunlight at the end of the long, dark economic tunnel we've been in.

Take a deep breath: There's the first scent of optimism in the air.

And for that we're grateful. And thankful.

Thank You for the Music

We have a very special treat this week, campers. A guest blogger! (A rookie, too, so hazing is perfectly acceptable -- and expected.) Steve Lundeen, a member of The Schnur Consulting Group and head of our Midwest region. He's got something good to say. So, please give him your full attention.

In his September 26 submission (You Could Be In Pictures), Alan waxed eloquent – I guess that’s redundant, he always does – about the music of our personal soundtrack. He asked important questions about what the background music playing during our day, our week, our highs, our lows would be. And, certainly, it’d be really great if we could hear the track to forewarn us of impending trouble or to help us recognize when a moment really is wonderful, euphoric...like those Viagra or Cialis ads. (Do you ever wonder how many of those you’re missing?)

For me the soundtrack in my life resonates when I pay attention, start listening with more than my ears. And it’s taking control, to the extent one can, of what’s playing. What’s your approach? Are you listening to the "radio” - where you’re having the soundtrack chosen for you? Or are you using your “CD player” -- where you’re in charge of your own, personal playlist?

Of course, we all live in a big, dynamic world where stuff is coming at us all the time...24/7. So, the trick is: How do we manage? I believe the key is doing a better, more focused job of managing what we can. Namely, ourselves. That truly is the only thing we can control. If we all take more time to focus on “self”, to build our own “playlist”, we will present to the world our personal best. And when we do that, everybody and everything gets better.

Alan’s submission ended with “May this – and every week – be filled with music that defines you.” That advice truly resonates with me. But more than define me, music serves as an inspiration. I wholeheartedly agree with Alan’s wish for all of us, but I’d like to add to it. Be proactive, take charge of inspiring yourself, don’t wait for your personal soundtrack to start playing...it is, in fact, already playing. In many ways, this may be a perfect time for you to hit the “pause” button on all the other noise in your life and put on your personal earphones and pay attention. Really pay attention.

I mentioned above focusing on self. Think about self for a moment. I’m not talking about selfish – but self. When you’re paying attention to self the volume on your personal sound track will start to crescendo. Noticing this will help you become more authentic. And when you get to that place, you and everything around you gets better. You’ll find yourself in a place of more clarity, calm, control. This may sound counter-intuitive to the world you live in. But when you settle into that calming place of authenticity and fulfillment you’ll perform that much better in your “orchestra”.

The next part of this is where/how is your music playing in the symphony of your life? (I’m working hard at keeping this metaphor going.) Unless you’ve decided to become a recluse, you’re “music” is an element of the bigger orchestra/band/combo/chorus in which you live.

I’ve spent my whole life being on a team, choirs and choruses; in athletics, from youth programs through semi-pro football; and, of course, corporate America. I believe the trick is to get real clarity around your “music” and then work to incorporate that into the environment, culture that helps bring resonance, clarity and, ultimately, joy to your life.

Here are a couple of videos that resonate with me. You’ll see incredible camaraderie, teamwork and fun, encouragement of risk-taking, operating out of one’s comfort zone – and yet feeling safe, making do with the talents and gifts we have, and the synergy of a group working in harmony.

In this first clip, do notice a very young Johnny Carson.



In this second video, be sure to notice the music these talented artists are making without instruments...just workin’ with what they’ve got.



I hope you enjoy...but mostly I hope this helps you focus on, and make a commitment to, defining your own music.


About Steve. Steve Lundeen has for over 25 years of experience as an executive with Eddie Bauer, Sunglass Hut International, Bath & Body Works and Life Time Fitness and has worked as a consultant and coach with Capella University, GfK Global Custom Research, Medtronic, Thrivent Financial, University of Minnesota and Xerox. Steve holds a BA from the University of Minnesota and a Coaching Certification from Coaches Training Institute, San Rafael, CA. While at the University of Minnesota, Steve was President of the Men’s Glee Club. Along with his wife, Katie, Steve has sung the National Anthem at several sporting events in Minneapolis (and enjoys a very successful won-loss record). Steve also has the distinction of being the starting center on the last Big 10 Championship football team from the University of Minnesota. He can be reached at steve@schnurconsulting.com. [Editor's note: Please write to him and abuse him as you do me. He'll love it.]

Thank You, Giants

Before our feet return to the ground, TJOW would like to extend a warm and heartfelt thank you to the San Francisco Giants. They've done something no other San Francisco baseball club has ever done. In the process, they've also provided a series of teachable moments for anyone interested in creating a culture of success, a tradition of winning.

Indeed, how the Giants became champions and, impressively, how they've handled themselves since winning the World Series establishes an important blueprint for any organization interested in outperforming their competition. In many ways, the Giants stole liberally from The Schnur Consulting Group's playbook on creating and sustaining high-performing organizations. And as life-long Giants fans, we're thrilled they did.

Thank you, Giants! Thank you for:

• Believing that the team is more important than any individual -- and building systems to support that concept.
  

• Demonstrating that 'chemistry' -- a.k.a. culture -- is essential to winning.

• Finding talented players who fit, who could be one of us, and who could truly become San Francisco Giants.
  

• Allowing the team to create its own stories, its own personalities, its own idiosyncrasies, its own internal rules. It's no irony that during the team's many losing years, facial hair and long hair were forbidden on Giants players. (It's unclear, though, if there was ever a rule against thongs...)
  

• Selecting for the post season roster only those capable of playing San Francisco baseball -- regardless of salary, tenure or age. (Thanks for being a mensch, Zito.)
  

• Honoring the traditions and the history of the organization. This is for you, Willie, Willie, Orlando, Juan, Will, J.T., Rich, Jeff, Barry and hundreds of other former players who laid the foundation.
  

• Including the entire organization in the World Series. The Giants chartered 747s to fly all front office staff and their families to Texas. An act undoubtedly never to be forgotten by those involved.
  

• Demonstrating that everyone associated with the team has a vital role. Ticket takers, other stadium personnel and front office staff marched at the head of the parade.
  

• Honoring those who added to the allure of the team. Steve 'Don't Stop Believing' Perry of Journey, Ashkon of 'Don't Stop Believing' parody fame (see last week's blog), and the 'Fear the Beard' phrase coiner were all featured in the parade.
  

• Encouraging fans -- customers -- to consider themselves to be an essential part of the team, and
  

• Knowing that emotion drives performance. And using it effectively to beat superior opponents.
  

Clearly, the Giants get it. Maybe other organizations can learn and apply some of the fundamentals demonstrated so brilliantly this season. We can show you how to make it happen.

But mostly, though, thank you for this, Giants. A trophy for the ages.

And especially for this.

The Wonderful Irrationality of Sport

According to television ratings, most people throughout the country are not aware of or simply don't care that the 106th World Series is in progress.

I assure you that that is not the case in San Francisco.

Halloween has definitely come early to the City By The Bay. As anyone in the Bay Area knows, it is virtually impossible to walk on any street in San Francisco without coming across dozens of orange and black-clad Giants fans.

People with eye black, some with fake, shoe-polish-black beards, others wearing panda hats, a few sporting rally thongs. Adults with orange dyed hair, many wearing t-shirts extolling the virtues of uttering a certain profanity on live television, equating Giants baseball with torture, the pitching powers provided by a currently illegal weed, or the need to fear, get this, the beard. (Hey, it's complicated.)

And on a game-day, people really get into it!

No, these aren't the insane (though one never really knows). And, no, these aren't just fans. These are people who love their whacky ball club. People who feel a connection to, an affinity with a group of baseball players they've likely never met and likely never will. On all other occasions, these are clear-thinking, rational people who have gone over the edge, gone completely ga-ga, for a sports team that has captured their heart.

It's better than that, actually. Somehow, someway, these people are part of this team. Not an extension of it. An actual part of it.

You hear it all around town: 'We can hit this pitcher.' 'When we play solid baseball, we win.' 'We've got these guys.' 'We can win this thing.'

With a strong emphasis on we.

Which, of course, is the essence -- and the irrationality -- of being a true fan. Caring deeply about your team and, inexplicably, feeling as if you are part of it.

Irrational, to be sure. Somehow like renaming a street in nearby Palo Alto after one of the players, decorating our train stations in orange and black, or bathing San Francisco's City Hall -- and a half dozen other buildings around town -- in orange lights.

Irrational, sure. And wonderful.

For there is simply nothing as exciting, as inclusive, as unifying as a sports team going deep into the playoffs. Scoff if you must, but what other event has a similar effect on a population? Where so many have so much in common and are so willing to share it. Where perfect strangers can and do strike up a conversation or simply high-five each other. Where civility -- holding doors being just one of many examples -- especially to fellow fans is widespread. Where people are happy. And where a passion brings together an entire community, fan and non-fan alike.

Scoff if you must, but this is the magic of sport. And if you're lucky enough to live in the Bay Area you know exactly of what I speak.

Coincidentally, the Giants marketing department used 'It's magic inside' (the ballpark) to promote this year's team. Clearly, the slogan is only partially correct. This year, it's simply magic.

We even have a song. And, at very long last, a World Championship.

Giants!

Things That Warm Our Hearts

A number of TJOW fans are currently in the throes of difficult treatment for life-threatening illnesses. While their courage and stamina are inspirational, their appreciation -- in some cases, new-found appreciation -- for life's small pleasures has been nothing short of eye-opening. And, personally, a gift -- as they have forced me to pause, smell those roses, and consider the things that I find special, things that warm the heart.

Nothing like facing one's mortality to find joy and amazement everywhere possible.

And those things that warm the heart? Here are just a few:

• A father and son holding hands, just because
  

• Women walking together, arms interlocked (so cosmopolitan, so endearing)

• Children sitting or walking together with arms around their shoulders
  

• People whistling, humming or singing to themselves in public

• People who are genuinely excited about and have deep passion for the work they do

• Leaders so well known throughout their company that they'd never be able to be on CEO Undercover or whatever that insipid television show is called

• Front-line employees who believe completely that they are essential to the success of their organization (Remind me to recount the story of the equipment assistant for the Super Bowl-winning San Francisco 49ers -- a guy who was taught by the team's coach, Bill Walsh, that he had a pivotal role in the team's championships. Gotta love it! We miss you, Bill.)

• No-star teams that out-maneuver and beat the Goliaths (Current case in point from the world of sports: The World Series-bound San Francisco Giants!)

• People who have the strength to ask for help when they need it

• People who provide help graciously
  

• The joy and renewed self-confidence that comes with becoming fully employed again following a long period of unemployment
  

• Teams -- real teams -- that come together without ego to perform miracles (!Hola Chile!)

• A good hug (not one of those fake and completely disingenuous air hugs)

• Anyone working to overcome a personal weakness

• Friends teaching me to appreciate the joys of life.

And did I mention the Giants?

What are the things that warm your heart, whether it be at work or elsewhere? We'd love to know.

Have a wonderful week.

High Highs, Low(er) Lows

In this era filled with emotional highs and lows -- life these days seems to have taken on the look and feel of a wild roller coaster, no? -- a question comes to mind: How do your emotional highs compare to your emotional lows?

Before you answer, consider it this way: If your normal emotional state is, say, 50 on a 100-point scale, what number would you ascribe to an emotional high? What number best defines an emotional low?

That question was posed to 25 randomly-selected adults (read: People who just happened to cross paths with me this week and were unable, despite their best efforts, to evade my questions.). The results were surprising (at least to me):

• The average 'high' = 78 (28 points above the midpoint)

• The average 'low' = 10 (40 points below the midpoint)

According to this very limited sample, our highs, in general, don't seem to be as powerful as our lows.

These same 25 adults were then asked to consider their experiences at work.

• The average 'high' at work = 66 (a mere 16 points above the mid-point)

• The average 'low' at work = 14 (36 points below the midpoint)

At work, it would seem, our highs are not nearly as powerful as our lows.

If these data have any validity, what might this say about us? That we're less able to experience happiness than we are sadness? That elation is not as powerful as disappointment? That we've been conditioned -- taught -- to focus less on our successes than on our failures and, in the process, to feel less joy? Or, possibly, is it that there's simply less to be happy about?

Before moving on, let's make an important assumption: That we're born with the ability to experience joy (the 'high') and sadness (the 'low') with equal intensity. Just watch any young child move instantly from unbridled laughter to intense tears and back again. This suggests that the assumption has merit.

So, if we begin life with the ability to experience highs and lows equally, what happens to us as we develop? I'd suggest the following:

• Many of us are taught from an early age that while success is important the avoidance of failure is even more important.
  

• We are taught as children that it is polite and appropriate to temper our demonstration of happiness, especially in front of others.

• In this country, where personal achievement is so highly valued and goals tend to be lofty, a disproportionate percentage of the population experiences more disappointment due to under-performance than happiness due to success.

• While success at work may be recognized, failure and the potential for failure are ever present and are incredibly powerful -- as evidenced by the 'what-have-you-done-for-me-today?' and the 'you-are-only-as-good-as-your-last-performance' syndromes. Said a different way, the casual 'Nice job.' is not nearly the equivalent of 'You failed.'.

• Sadly, we may have fewer opportunities to experience elation than we do sadness or disappointment. (This may be especially true in the workplace.) As a result, our ability to feel elation fully when the moment presents itself may diminish over time.

• And maybe, as my nephew put it, we're better at being sad than we are at being happy.
  

Regardless, it's a sorry state of affairs if our highs aren't as powerful as our lows. It's also a sorry state of affairs if we have fewer highs than lows. But, just possibly, sadness is a stronger emotion than happiness. More on this in the weeks ahead.

But talking about high highs, though, how about the saving of the 33 trapped miners in Chile? An amazing story and lasting memories for anyone who watched the flawless rescue effort. To this, I say:

Chi-Chi-Chi Le-Le-Le!

Y para mis amigos en Chile:

!Lo que es un logro maravilloso! Con todo el mundo viendo, el pais realizo un milagro. Guardo 33 hombres, sus familias y las unnumerables personas que algun dia viviran porque estos hombres han regresado. Es verdaderamente un milagro y tenemos que dar las gracias. Que le han dado la esperanza del mundo.

(!Perdonar la falta de acentos! No estan disponibles en esta pila.)

Have a good week. Look for happiness. It's everywhere.

Got Soul?

I was asked recently by a very dear friend, a brother from another mother, to define 'soul'. Not soul food, soul mate, soul kiss, soul brother or sister, nor soul music. Not even the soul itself. Too bad, too, because I would have had a fighting chance with those. No, his interest was with having soul.

Do we all have soul?, he asked. Is soul something we grow, develop, enhance? Is it gender- and/or racial-specific? Does soul vary by religion? Must a serious hardship -- illness, death, poverty -- be experienced to have soul? What does having soul look like? How would I know if I have soul? Would others know if I have soul? Would having soul show?

One inquisitive dude, to be sure. Remind me next time to confine the conversation to a less weighty topic like, say, the meaning of life or the creation of the universe.

So, let's talk soul, specifically having soul. And let's start easy (since that's all I may be capable of) and avoid how religions approach the topic. You're on your own there.

Soul is a person's moral and emotional core, the essence of who we are. It defines how we communicate, emote, love. It's what we might refer to as heart, but deeper, more central to our identity. Soul is, in other words, who we are.

If confirmation is needed (hard to believe, given that you're reading the printed word on the Internet, where only truth exists), 'psychology' literally means 'study of the soul'. So as a psychologist, all in all, I'm perfectly equipped to answer my friend's questions.

Right. But I'll try, nevertheless.

Having soul, I humbly offer, is the state of being in which the convictions of the heart drive behavior. Having soul, therefore, is an observable trait. It can be seen. It is real. It defines an individual. It is values-based. It is emotional. It may be one of the coolest things -- if not the coolest thing -- we can possess.

Indeed, people who have soul:

• Are grounded and defined by strong morals
  
• Speak openly and honestly about their beliefs and values
  
• Are concerned for the well-being of others
• Provide support and assistance to those in need
• Freely display a wide range of emotions, regardless of social norms or whether 'it's the right time, right place'
  
• Laugh loudly, cry passionately
• Eat and love with abandon
• Enjoy and need physical contact with others
• Feel, really feel the joys and sorrows of this bizarre thing called 'life, and, importantly,
• Are absolutely and relentlessly true to their convictions.
  

Those who have soul may not be the happiest among us. But, for sure, they feel the most, because those who have soul have found a way to clear the barriers that typically exist between one's heart and the choices one makes about behavior. Those who have soul behave more consistently with what they believe to be right, with what they feel to be right. For them, heart and mind are one. Thus, for those who have soul, the expression 'heart and soul' is largely redundant.

We can talk about how having soul likely indicates self-actualization, but we'll leave the psycho-babble to a minimum here. Suffice it to say, that those who have soul are more real, more aware and more honest about who they are than those who don't. Those who have soul are more alive.

So, got soul?

An update from Chile. On Saturday morning, a drill, operated by workers around the clock for weeks, reached the 33 miners trapped nearly a half mile below the surface in northern Chile. It was a moment of euphoric celebration on both ends of the escape shaft. Completion of the tunnel excited the entire country, as many Chileans view the rescue as a test of national character and pride.

"What began as a potential tragedy is becoming a verified blessing," President Sebastian Pinera said in Santiago. "When we Chileans set aside our legitimate differences and unify in a grand and noble cause, we are capable of great things."

Amazingly, reports from the site indicate that the miners, who have been trapped since August 5, are fighting to see who would be rescued last. Talk about having each other's backs.

If all goes according to plan, the first miner will see sunlight on Wednesday after a 11- to 12-minute ride in a 21 inch-wide capsule nicknamed Phoenix. Oh, to be there when that first miner emerges! Stay tuned. This story may have a very happy ending.

It was 70 years ago. Happy belated birthday, John. We miss you. Not Yoko, just you.

Years ago, the advertising agencies of Canada participated in a novel competition. Agencies drew a number at random and were tasked with creating a campaign to market that number. TBWA Chiat/Day selected the number 4. Their mock ad, printed in The Toronto Star, Canada's largest newspaper, showed the faces of each of the four Beatles and Yoko Ono against a black background. Their slogan: All you need is 4 -- because five fucks things up. They took second place.

Does It Get Any Better Than This?

A couple of terrific sightings:

In Berkeley below the rear license plate of a car: A clear and vivid statement about the quality of one's job. (Apologies to those who may be offended by the rough language.)

We at TJOW wonder at least four things:

1. What compelled this person to put this harsh statement on the back of his or her car? What makes the job so bad that the car's owner needed to share this observation with the world? We can only guess.

2. How many people feel similarly about their job? Our bet: Many. Especially during these very difficult times and the 'stuff' some companies are inflicting on their employees.

3. Does this person park the car in the employee lot at work? Probably not a good idea -- unless, of course, the car's owner wants his or her views known about the sucky job. Certainly a possibility.

4. Can it be said any better? When it comes to capturing a sentiment, this one takes the cake. Props to the author for such eloquence and candor.

Seen later that same day on a gorgeous early October day in San Francisco: The Giants clinching the National League West Division.

A very sweet ending to the 2010 regular season.

Immediately after this photo was taken, the Giants team trotted around the entire perimeter of the field high-fiving fans. It was a rare sight in professional sports: Athletes recognizing, connecting with and thanking the fans. A generous and heart-felt act, to be sure. Made at least one observer forget the many bone-head plays and poor at-bats displayed by his favorite baseball club. It also reminded the same observer about the power of 'Thank you'.

By the way, we at TJOW know that sports is trivial, has no real impact on the world, and is, essentially, only entertainment. There are still wars, hundreds of thousands are still displaced in Haiti, India continues to recover from its deadly floods, miners are still trapped in Chile and millions of Americans remain out of work. Yes, we know all of that. We also know that a winning team can make the world a bit brighter, one's mood a bit lighter, one's heart a bit warmer, the challenges of the day a bit less intimidating. Irrational, to be sure. But ask any fan after a good win and you'll get the same thing: Life is good.

And life is good. Even so, some of us will need a few days to recuperate very hoarse voices and regain the strength lost to the torture that is San Francisco Giants baseball. (Giants fans know exactly of what I speak.) Good thing the playoffs for the Giants do not begin until Thursday evening. I, for one, could use the break.

Bring on the Braves!

Next week's topic: Soul. Don't miss it.

You Could Be In Pictures

Ever notice how a soundtrack can make a good film a great one? How music in film can create tension, fear, elation? How a story can be advanced with soaring strings, dissonant chords, or the ominous rhythms warning us of an approaching great white shark? How music heightens our fear as the knife-brandishing stalker moves through the dark house? (Turn on the lights, you fool!) How music seems to increase the speed and excitement of any chase scene? How a love song, growing in volume as the couple on screen finds each other at long last, can make your heart dance and your eyes tear?

Sure you have. Music is one of the great things about film.

Ever notice, though, that the players on camera never hear the music? Seems like a missed opportunity. Because if they heard what we hear there would be far fewer shark victims and fewer people getting skewered in the dark. Characters would know sooner and with greater clarity who longs for them. Tragedy might be averted. Love might flourish. And while it would undoubtedly diminish the viewer's experience, it would help the characters on screen immeasurably.

Which brings me, at last, to the point: Where is our soundtrack? Where is the music that defines our life? Where's our playlist?

What music plays in the background as we move through the week, during our highs and lows? What music warns us of impending trouble or foreshadows upcoming joy? What music confirms the emotions behind a stranger's -- or co-worker's -- fervent glance? What music provides confidence and purpose to our gait? What music offers hope?

It's there. It's got to be there. We just can't hear it.

What a shame, too. Because we can all use the help a soundtrack would provide. We can all use guidance as we move headlong toward trouble. We can all use every clue we can get to make better decisions. We can all use the added joy, the increased confidence, the greater richness background music brings. We can all use more support. We can all use more romance, more love. Definitely more soul.

But unlike the movies, in real life we're left to our own devices. Which means, of course, that the soundtrack to our life is up to each of us. And I've started to assemble mine.

I leave you with a Bonnie Raitt tune and a Tower of Power medley that are part of my soundtrack. Crank up the volume, kick back and enjoy. And while you're dancing, ask yourself: What's in your soundtrack?

May this -- and every week -- be filled with great music that defines you.